Almost every day I see articles or blog posts or status updates on facebook declaring parenthood as awful, or unsatisfying, or any number of other things that are negative. I can’t stand this…
When I was growing up I never really wanted to be a parent, or be married for that matter. But after I married M, I really changed my mind. I wanted children badly and I couldn’t wait to be a parent. When we had Arlie, I was so incredibly happy. Being a parent is hard, I will not deny that. But it is also the best thing I have every done. I LOVE my children. I adore Arlie and I think she is awesome. I like being around her. I have very little desire to not be around her or to “take a break”. I actually find it mildly offensive when people ask me if I want them to take Arlie for a night so I can get a “break”. What these people don’t understand is that I literally live the rest of my life to ensure that I have time with Arlie. I don’t want a break. I like my kid. I think she is amazing and funny and clever and just all around great. Yes, she is a brat sometimes. Yes, she makes me crazy sometimes. Yes, there are times that I leave her with M so I can go upstairs and escape from her for 15 minutes. But I am making a conscious choice to spend time with her. Not out of guilt or out of what I think I should be doing. I spend time with her because I genuinely enjoy the time I have with her.
Occasionally I find myself wondering if I am weird because I like my kid so much. I mean, is it weird that I had a child and I actually want to hang out with her? I really don’t think that it is. Arlie is an amazing little person. I am looking forward to having another little person around. I find being a parent to be the most fulfilling thing I have ever done. I am constantly surprised by people around me that complain frequently about their kids. Or refer to their kids in a negative way. It confuses me, because ultimately, having a kid is a CHOICE. No one is forcing people to have children and I think we ALL know how a baby comes to be.
This sounds ranty, and a little judgemental and that is not really my intention. My intention is to make it clear that I really and truly enjoy being a parent. I honestly like my kid (soon to be kids) and I feel lucky to be a parent. I think that this all goes back to being a person who experienced loss and was on a path with others who have also experienced loss. It changes the way you look at parenting. And how you choose to parent too.
I’d like to see more articles and more blog posts about how awesome it is to be a parent. And how lucky we all are to have these amazing kids. I know I am lucky. I know that Arlie is an incredible blessing and I am so in love with her. I’d like to bottle this feeling and keep it forever because as she gets older, I know it will get harder. As I approach an entirely new and very scary part of my life, I am looking forward to seeing how Tate fits into the mix. Will my love expand? Will Tate be like Arlie and make me cry with laughter on a daily basis? I am excited to see what happens next.